Nancy B.

I have read some of the negative reviews and feel compelled to add some clarity. Yes - this approach puts the need to change on the wife, it's because mostly wives sign up and if we are all honest we aren't going to change our husbands. Paul does go into great detail in the twelve weeks about how we can only control ourselves, there are a lot of times women are encouraged to seek safety - severe abuse etc. He is not blaming women for the marriage failure. - he is crediting women for the power to make marriage succeed and that by controlling our emotions, our thoughts and connecting with our hearts we can make our marriages what we would like them to be. I do hear women talking about their husbands at the hair or nail salon and even before taking this course - I would think, that man cannot be happy married to a woman who talks about him to perfect strangers that way - Paul is trying to help women reign in the chatter and look at their choices - are we as wives choosing to be positive and uplifting, or are we breaking our husband's spirits - many of the extreme marital examples he gave that husbands are doing - like porn, cheating, abuse, affairs etc. those are not our issues - I took the course as I have taken others - I like Jimmy Evans who has a marriage ministry and I read a lot, so when I saw the course video, I thought why not. I have at times been a tad annoyed with Paul. LOL but he is right when he says, rewatch the videos that are annoying because they are likely the ones that are pointing out what you need to change. I asked for my course to be delivered in one cluster - and TMF accommodated my request, I have listened to all the videos multiple times and I don't think any of us can go wrong with learning to control what we say. We treat strangers politely and kindly - we are lovely when we first start courtships - why not treat our husbands the best of the best? I never write reviews but felt that some of the comments were taken slightly out of context unless the whole course was completed and hope this will provide additional information. I asked my hubby did he want to sign up and he said sure - but chances are pretty high he may not actually do the course, he is so very busy, and that's okay. I am learning to be softer and kinder and sweeter to my hubby. We can get into habits that don't support great communication and not even realize it and that's what Paul is trying to get the spouse who signs up to do - be thoughtful in the output (you don't have to say everything that comes to your mind), make choices about what we say and do and recognize we only have the power to change ourselves, - NOT our spouses. If I was dealing with some of the examples given,I am not so sure I could control my thoughts as my hubby did some horrible things, I believe that would be very very difficult. But …. Ultimately it's our choice to change how we feel, behave, think and do.