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This site is great if you enjoy being harassed. I have personally witnessed an older member, Sassy762 stalk and harass women on this site. She took all the pictures women posted of themselves and their families (including their children) and made a blog to make fun of them. She has also called cps on members that she has cyber stalked. Admin knows this woman is a threat to the safety of others yet they allow her reign of terror to continue.
Another issue is that harassment is permitted under the anonymous feature. You are able to say anything you like without using your screen name. Trolls use this to demean mothers. I have witnessed a grieving mother who lost her newborn told that she deserved it. Others have used it to make fun of children with disabilities. Racists, misogynists, and bullies abound on Cafemom.
Tip for consumers: Do not reveal any personal information on this site. Your photos will be stolen. Be careful, vigilant, and wear your thickest skin.Ask Shelly about CafeMom
My experience has been pleasant, and I'm mainly involved with larger groups. I'm a known member and have zero stalkers in real life. Some members have become very dear friends.
I make sure to be pleasant and polite, although I'm not perfect. In return, people reciprocate. As long as you aren't a walking lifetime movie, people will be pleasant. They will call you out on self induced drama. They still also respond if you act like a jerk.
I've been involved with the site from beta testing days (2006 when I was asked to join and help launch it) and I can honestly say it's disappointing. I have watched it evolve and turn into such a nasty place. Groups run by the CM team (mega groups) are the most awful place to be. Those are uncontrolled chaos with inconsistency of administration. If it wasn't for a small group of women that have been a great support system throughout the years, I'd have left the site and never looked back. CM has made some horrible steps, but they don't care, it's all $$$ for page views and that seems to be working for them. I'd never recommend it to any of my friends or family.
I've been a member since the start and I would never recommend this site. There are nothing but stalkers and trolls. The admins are a joke and let it go on and they wash their hands of it. If you don't want your children, family, or exes contacted by other members, I suggest you don't join.
Tip for consumers: stay away from the psych ward, and cafemom main groups. None of them are friendly or helpful. This site is a complete waste of time. Below picture is tame compared to the normal name calling associated with the site.Ask Venny about CafeMom
Cafemom. What can you say about CM? I've participated on CM off and on for 6 years now. Sure it can get crazy and there are some outrageous trolls, but for the most part, it's fun. It is a great way to get advice and opinions from all sorts of ladies. You just have to know how to weed out the bad with the good. You have to ignore the trolls and the "do-gooders". Most of the moms are there to help and get to know others. You just have to know that certain groups are not there to do that. The private, member owned groups are the best for advice compared to the CM admin owned groups.
CaféMom: This is an adult Mom site, and like any other adult site there is a range of topics and opinions and attitudes. Thankfully this is an American based site that allows everyone to state their opinions freely, and openly, as long as insults are held somewhat at bay. E.G. You can't openly call another mom stupid, a whore, a c*nt, or a b*tch, etcetera. Of course those who are somewhat educated and understand how to word things, can easily get past that, and deliver a much needed/deserved insult where it's needed.
There are hundreds of private groups on CaféMom that allow for personal friendly support, and advice. All one needs to do is seek, and they shall find what they need.
You will find that 99% of the negative reviews on this site are by moms who ignorantly thought the group Mom Confessions was the place to get that support. They soon found out differently, but instead of moving to a smaller supportive groups, they chose to stay in Confessions, and whine and complain about bullying. (Americas crippling snowflake syndrome at it's best) Confessions is a fun, no holds barred, group where shocking confessions are often posted by moms, and trolls alike, for their shock value, and the horrified responses they get. It has the anonymous option for that reason. It is a lively group where humor, and having the ability to post shocking confessions, along with brilliant smart ass comebacks is a must. It's for nothing but entertainment, and those who have any intelligence realize this within 10 mins of joining that group. It's called Confessions for a reason. Does anyone really expect roses and sunshine there?
If you want advice or need support it can be found on CaféMom, but everyone should take their time, investigate the groups, before just jumping in, and posting all their most private problems and issues. Because you will be told what people think and sometimes it's brutal. But the truth while brutal can be educational, force one to look closely at themselves, change what needs to be changed, get professional help with serious issues, so they can go on and have a better life, which helps them to be a better mom to their children. And isn't that what CaféMoms supposed to be about anyway?
The group admins like any organization or group do have their favorites, who get away with breaking rules, and then there are those who purposely irk the admins by pushing the rules, and they do get spanked for their trouble. So play at your own risk. But know this, as much as people complain and say they hate that site, if they get banned ( and they do) they will and do go to any extent to get re-admitted. Because secretly we all love it, are addicted to it, and the friendships, and drama it adds to our day. (any helpful advice we get is a lovely extra bonus)
Simply put, CaféMom is a place for support and play. It all depends on where you look and what you are truly seeking. If you need help with an issue, find a small private group and take your time reading and getting to know how that group flows, before just jumping in, and stating your issue, and how you think it should be handled. If you want entertainment head to the Confessions groups or any other officially labeled b*tch groups on CaféMom and have fun. But always wear your big girl panties or be willing to kick ass commando style. (wink)
** As with any internet site, do not give out personal information that will allow others to identify you outside of CM. Do not share pictures of your home, yourself or children. All will be critiqued, and many will use the information you provide to prove you as a liar later if given the chance. Think of members as elephants with long memories. Be smart, use a screen name that does not identify you to anyone inside or outside of CM, because chances are your neighbors and family members are also members who keep that information secret.
Enjoy the Café, and remember to have fun and laugh!
I've been a member of cafemom for several years. It has gotten worse and worse as time goes on. It does have some positive aspects, but countless more negatives ones. My following comments are not directed toward one group (Mom Confessions), as these things have happened to me in private groups and various areas of the site.
I've had issues with members stalking me on the site and off, if they don't like my opinion. I've encountered some of the craziest people I've ever known on this site. The amount of drama, bashing, and troll posts is ridiculous. The team doesn't do anything to prevent legitimate harassment on the site, but punishes members who are blunt - not cruel - with others, if they're new or not well known. It rewards the bad behaviors of well known members by spotlighting them and their life (they have video interviews of select members; I don't know what the point of that is - one of them is a total witch but everyone kisses her butt, including the team). Lesbian mothers whom I've gotten close with, turned out to be either their husbands, or flat out deranged lunatics who send their friends to screw with you when you have had enough of their craziness. I've been through hell on this site and have no idea why I'm still a member. Maybe a small part of me has hopes that I'll actually meet decent people on it, I don't know. The blocking system is $#*!, as well. I don't recommend this site one bit, but if you're the type that loves drama and bringing others down, then join the rest of the bullies and crazies that infest the site. I know not all the members are mothers or even women, so that doesn't help the infestation...however, the awful people who ARE mothers, are the most cruel and heartless human beings you can come across online. Hiding behind a computer or phone screen makes it so easy, unfortunately.
I have been on Cafemom for five years. I find it funny that people claim to be bullied on the site. You can easily block anyone from touching your posts. I also tend to see a pattern of women who don't want to face reality, owning up to their bad choices or wanting to play the victim when it's untrue. Then saying others are bullying them when the other moms are simply agreeing that the person needs to own up to their part in the problems in their life. It's an honest group of people, if you're right they will tell you/ if you're wrong they will tell you. I see that as a good thing.
It is what it is. A social networking site. You get what you give. You put out negative and you will get negative back. You put out sarcasm and some will get it while others will be offended. Positive isn't always recognized. It is what it is.
I will say that the admin over there seem very bias. Certain individuals get away with behavior that others would get the ban for.
I would not recommend the site to anyone before. Back when it first started I would have suggested it to anyone.
Very negative site. It's used to judge others and pick on those who are asking advice. I went on there to get support on the ttc groups and made comments and posts in others and got mainly negative feedback. We should be able to use this for support and most people use it to attack.
I love cafemom. I joined just 5 months after it launched in 2007. Yes it has gotten a bit chaotic over the years but I have made amazing friends and have had a great support system. The "big" groups are usually drama filled but the private groups are great. I'm so happy I got to meet the people I did. I have friendships that will last a lifetime.
Obviously the people posting reviews believe the world is filled with rainbows and unicorns that cater just to them, so of course they are shocked to find a site that allows women and moms in particular to voice their true opinions on topics ranging from superficial to intensely controversial.
I have met some truly wonderful women on this site and read some discussions that have opened my eyes to differing view points. I guess I like cafemom because I realize that the world isn't censored so how can we have honest discussion about real life things if we are constantly being censored?
Www.cafemom.com is supposed to be a safe haven for moms...not a place to get bullied and bashed and trolled. I was a member of cafemom for 4 years and everything was fine. Then i got divorced and recently got married again but couldn't change my user name so I made a new account. I posted 1 damn post venting about my husbands ex wife and how she does the kids and asking for opinions as to what I should do. In the first line I even put "PLEASE NO BASHING". I had 82 replies to the post and 78 of them were $#*!es bashing, bullying, and trolling. It was awful. I informed the admin for that group and got no reply. I cancelled my account and told them I would never be back to their site unless the bullies were banned...
It starts out very pleasant but the more you get involved on the site you get BULLIED and attacked. I made one comment on an older women's comment who was a bronze member n said she was being very mean and hateful n rude to this younger mom n she attacked and STALKED ME! She found any and every comment I had made to other ppls posts and attacked me n would make comments on how dumb, uneducated n lots of other nasty things and The ppl who manage the site did nothing. It's like a adult women Facebook. They worry bout the bullying of kids on FB committing suicide I'd be more worried bout the bulling on cafemom. Stay away no one needs the hatefulness
This is a really great forum if you like to be bullied. Depending on the groups you belong to, Cafemom.com is very clicky and does not like "new" members. I honestly think this site is for women who have major issues with their spouses, or lack there of, and don't know how to raise their now, spoiled rotten kid(s). Some groups have more "mature" group members who
use derogatory insults, bullying & profanity when you don't agree with their views or just because they don't like you. This sIte allows this and offers little solution or protection to its members. Group Administrators do not police posts nor remove group members who harass and bully others. Anyone can become an Admin and most of them are troublemakers and love to stir the pot. This site is full of drama and the women on here are either crackheads or very seriously whacked. They have "no life" and makeup things to get attention. It is really quite sad. A bunch of caddy women who are, obviously, very unhappy in their personal life. If they were happy they wouldn't be on here 24/7 using derogatory insults which is usually followed by an "LOL". They talk about their kids and how great they are (LOL) and, obviously, they are neglected. It's a shame that cafemom.com does not have counsellors on board to help these women who clearly are not living in reality. Again, so sad...
GREAT FORUM IF YOU LIKE TO BE BULLIED! It really depends on the groups you belong to. Some groups have more "mature" group members who are supportive or at least reply with constructive feedback even if they don't agree with you. However, group admins do not police posts nor remove group members who harass and bully others. This can be a bullying website. And b/c the owner of the site and the group admins allow the worst kind of bullying (ie attacks on children) I chose to leave the site. The ABSOLUTE WORST, MOST CHILDISH, BULLYING GROUP IS THE "MILITARY" GROUP.
I haven't really talked to much people on Cafemom... but I have tryed to find stay at home jobs.. and alot of them are scam sites.. are don't even pay as much as some of mom's claim in posts...
I was horribly bullied on this site. I was suffering from severe PPD, and as a stay at home mom without any close family in the state, I was hoping to get some support online. I thought surely there were others.
I found particularly the stay at home mom group to be an insular, catty, cliche who loved nothing more than picking on the new members. Traumatic experience to say the least. I contacted the company to see what they were doing to prevent these things. Nothing. They are doing nothing.
Derogatory insults, bullying & profanity when you don't agree with their views. Site allows this & offers little solution or protection to its members.
A very politically liberal site that gives liberals preferential treatment and mistreats conservatives.
Conservatives need their own site and need to come away from Cafemom.
Upon reading many (biased agendas full of false info) articles I then go to reading the many comments. I am shocked that they allow direct insults, racial slurs, open attacks written by their many members,and I can only guess that altho this kind of thing goes against thier website rules......they are purposely allowing it to further their inflammatory viewpoints. If you agree with the articles u will do fine...otherwise stay away from this activist driven super liberal agenda site.
I actually believe the website and the whole concept is cool. Where my problem comes in is their discriminatory practices. I joined as I am trying to meet other moms and moms-to-be since I plan to be a mom myself in the very near future. I tried to log in today and found my account information not working. I contacted their staff via email and received a very insensitive response telling me my account was canceled because I am not a mother and not "actively trying to conceive." First I consider it rude that they did not notify me before (1)accepting my membership or (2)canceling my account. Then for them to tell me that I am not "actively trying to conceive" is beyond me. I almost feel like my rights have been violated. Eck!
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