NoPoet N.

I'm writing this extensive review from a man's perspective. This review was edited (again) on 21. 9. 15.

This is a genuine dating site and I've met a lot of girls from POF since joining in 2012 (using the site infrequently). I've had a number of relationships but due to this effectively being blind dating, and lots of people on POF having serious personal problems, I don't think it is possible to find "the one" on here so I no longer use it.

I used POF because I am extremely shy around women, possibly due to being mild aspergers, and it is hard for me to make the first move (women usually don't because "equality" and it is hard to logically explain to me why strange women are worth the anxiety and stress of talking to).

I have learned to be very suspicious why some women would even use online dating if they're as "in-demand" as they usually say they are. ("I pull an average of three blokes on every night out... PLEASE DATE ME AND HAVE SEX WITH ME")

I recently deleted my profile because of two women who were plainly psychos, but also because most women seem to be there to get their ego stroked. Beware the "friend collector" who cancels the day before the first date but wants to stay in touch as friends - this is probably the most common type now.

I would advise men who "must" use POF to consider becoming a paid member as it massively increases your chances at getting messages or replies, for a while anyway. POF will automatically renew your paid subscription - you must make sure this option is disabled as they don't do refunds.

Men *might* average one to three messages per week with a good picture and a good profile, provided he is VERY active on the site and a paid member, but most will go weeks or months without any contact at all. Women, contrary to what they say, do not seem to read your profile and do not like long profiles or long messages. Women also don't like pics of men looking directly at the camera or without a shirt, even though many of them post pics of themselves pole dancing or showing way too much leg. They also prefer to send you messages just saying "Hi" (which they themselves hate to receive).

Women get a "flirt option" where they can "express an interest in you" - there is no explanation provided to the male member of what this actually means, or why she didn't just send you a message. A few have strenuous lists of demands, and some even ask you to score yourself to see if it's worth messaging them.

The site says 1 in 3 of your messages won't get a reply. Literally, I think my overall response rate was 15%, which is actually really good for a man. Most women only send one or two very short responses that are nearly impossible to turn into a conversation. You are lucky if you actually date one in every hundred women. And I don't think I actually dated a woman who I messaged first.

I will warn you now that being a male on POF will earn you the status of "scum of the earth" and some women will take their problems out on you, give you the run around, cheat on you and she is unlikely to look anything like her profile pictures (I've never met a girl who looked exactly like her pics).

Typically women start sending me sexts by the end of the first or second day. One even recorded herself moaning my name on Whatsapp (we hadn't even met).

About two thirds of the women I managed to date offered sex, or admitted they wanted sex, on the first night. More than one girl didn't want to see me again after I declined first date sex. One girl cried when I said no, then threatened me the next day.

I learned through POF that the ONE thing women can never hear is the word "no" - you don't say it to the monkeys in Planet of the Apes, you most certainly don't say it to a woman who's getting 10 messages a day, because she's on par with God, apparently.

So, to be "successful" on POF, be an aspie; let women make the first move; do not buy her a meal or spend much money on the first date; or better yet, overcome your fears and ask women out in real life, you're 90% less likely to get murdered.

If you're looking for a hookup, POF is frustrating and demoralising but can work, but I was looking for love, and that doesn't exist on POF.

While the IQ test became very challenging for me after an early start, as I'm aspergers and struggle to visualise things especially when under pressure, I got to the end of the test only to be told I won't get my score unless I give them my mobile number, where they'll charge me £5 for sending me an SMS. There is no mention elsewhere on their site that I could see about payment. Also there are nonsensical statements and general bad grammar, which do not really impress on a website that's supposed to measure intelligence. Scam, avoid.

People moan about this website without reading it properly. You have to pay to get an in-depth explanation of your score. You get your actual IQ test by email immediately. This doesn't speak much for the problem-solving or analytical abilities of some people, so their scores were probably crap. However the test scores seem to come in high, I scored about 144 a couple of years ago and 145 today. Other websites tend to score me 135-144.