Mary H.

I'm an outsider looking in. I have good insight on these programs because I was an addict for 15 years before spending 18 months in a program like this. I've now been clean for 11 years. For those who don't know or understand addiction, depression or what ever your problem is... you were not born that way and it took some learned behavior to get to the bottom. So to get out it takes some extreme measures. First you have to be brought down to nothing, to a point were even the most simple thing (such as a pack of sugar or a small bag of chips or choosing when you get to sit down, talking on the phone, writing a letter, etc. etc...) are important. This is how your brain gets reprogrammed to appreciate the small stuff and forget about the bad stuff. This takes 3 to 6 months. For me it took 6 months to get to this stage. I tried and tried to "buck" the system. Thank the Lord my husband and family said if I left, I couldn't come home... I had no home other than this "horrible cult people place". Yes, at that point I too believed it was a cult. You learn to talk to God again, because He's the only one that will listen to you complain. Finally, I started to relax and go with the flow. I didn't realize that the process was working... my brain was being reprogrammed, I was being reborn. The person I was ashamed of was slipping away and the new person was being reborn. New it's time for the next stage... here you are this new person and you dont know yourself anymore. Who is this person I have become? Where do I go from here? How do I get there? That is why it's important to NOT LEAVE NOW! You need to be in a controlled environment during this stage. Just like you can't just let a toddler have her way in a candy store. Supervision is important. Visits from your family, more phone calls, letters, maybe a picture of your family. You start getting more privileges one thing at a time. You'll find yourself closer to God and that you talk to Him now not to complain about your situation, but just to talk to Him. Then you go to the last stage. Continuing your growing and helping the new lost souls that come in. That are in the same place you were. You will take a lot of abuse from them, but now you are healthy enough to deal with it and to give them the understanding you once received.
MARY H. From Louisiana
Clean 11 years because of a similar program an God