Mark I.

Everything seemed great - until we got to Apartment 1 "Clifton on Golden Mile" at 63 Victoria Road, Clifton, Cape Town, South Africa. (BR*******).
DO NOT EVEN THINK OF STAYING IN THIS PLACE.
This apartment was listed by Darryl and Ron Mink on Flipkey and Air B n B for R3,252.00 per night. We were charged R 6,041.00 and we have not been able to get an explanation as to why this happened nor have we had a refund. Both Flipkey and the apartment owners have been silent and completely unresponsive to our proof of this (screen shots of the adverts from both sites with exact dates of our booking) and we have not been able to get any satisfaction at all. The advertising says that this apartment sleeps 3 - that's only true if number 3 is a SMALL child - the apartment is TINY! The apartment is situated directly above and on a very busy narrow main road that is always filled with traffic and is very, very noisy. Dozens of roofless red Double Decker Free Tour buses thunder past all day blowing clouds of diesel fumes into the apartment! (keep all doors and windows closed at all times). Then there are the thousands of cars, bikes and bicycles going from Cape Town to Camps Bay and vice versa all day every day. The constant traffic and brutal noise starts soon after 6:00 am and does not stop until about 9:00 pm every day. This is not mentioned in the advertising! The advertising for this apartment states that there is on site parking - this is not true! Parking is by arrangement at a private roof top lot down the road. The advertising states that there is a TV - this is not true, there is no TV! The advertising states that the furniture is "eclectic" when in fact the furniture is old, mismatched and extremely uncomfortable! There were long black hairs all over the lounge room carpet and in both bedrooms and in the shower. Ugh! There was broken glass in the carpet in the main bedroom. The is one small air conditioning system in the main bedroom and it needs to be on 24/7 as it's the only source of air in the whole place. If you do not keep the louver shutters closed all day and all night there is NO PRIVACY in the bedroom! Just Great! The are no mirrors in the entire apartment except for a small one in the tiny bathroom. There are no electric outlets in the bathroom, so to use a hair dryer (remember to bring your own as what they have is crap) one needs to find an extension cord and plug it into another room outlet. The door handle to the main access door is broken and keeps falling on the ground. The door handle to the exterior front door should have broken off by now as it was almost off in January 2018. There is a safe in the apartment, but it is locked and cannot be used. The cooking utensils are terrible and the frying pan(s) are so scratched and stained that we had to buy a new one (and we took it with us when we left). The pantry had not been properly cleaned in ages. Whatever food we brought into the apartment we kept on the dining table. The toaster is tiny and one has to cut bread in half to get it in. The bathroom is internal and has no window - but it does have an exhaust fan that is as noisy as a jet engine but it neither sucks nor blows (so yes, it sucks!). There is no BBQ. There are no beach towels. There are no instructions as to how to use any of the appliances. There were light fittings without globes and no spare globes. Everything is the cheapest quality but the apartment is advertised as " Clifton on Golden Mile". They advertise that one can sit on the balcony, have a drink and watch the sunset. This is quite true BUT it's best to only do this if you are deaf as the noise from the continuous traffic is so loud and so constant that it's not long before you're back in doors. You can't even turn up the TV to drown out the traffic noise - there is no TV or radio. My advise would be - DO NOT STAY HERE! If you have a booking CANCEL OR YOU WILL REGRET IT. Rather stay in Cape Town or Seapoint as you have to drive around anyway and Clifton is a nightmare of constant traffic with no where to park. The owners have been Misleading and Deceptive in their advertising of this place and I now make you aware of this. Finally, there was NO ONE to greet us when we arrived and NO ONE to see us off when we left. We cleaned the place, left the keys in the apartment and left without a glance back. Our week in Clifton was memorable but for all the wrong reasons.