J J.

I have sporadically participated in the BBC community for years. I knew what it was but I wanted to be an occasional voice of reason. I quickly learned to avoid the Birth Boards at all costs. I saw enough on most of the relationship boards that I mostly didn't comment, but would read along if I needed a drama fix, and very occupy comment that the OP didn't need to follow terrible advice just because it was being shouted at them. I would also very occasionally start a thread, or comment if it was not likely to blow up, for fun but I mostly knew how to avoid attracting the negative attention of the "GO's" and the bully pile-ons that happen way too often, especially in the bigger groups. It's true, the bullying was pretty blatant but I was mostly (not entirely) able to avoid being targeted by it. I did have several posters tell me I needed to leave my husband because he wouldn't agree to adopt a rescue animal that was in danger of being put down. I repeat they wanted me to choose a pet over my marriage!

I finally left when one of the clicks decided to attack anyone NOT participating in their "Revolution" or more accurately their decision to hijack one of the bigger groups over frustration with the fact that it wasn't their preferred flavor of echo chamber. They decided that anyone not actively participating in it didn't have any business participating anywhere else in the entire community either. They had already been following and attacking posters who had called them out on their double standards and harassed them until they eventually went silent. But apparently their blood-thirst wasn't fully sated yet so they took to attacking posters who were simply staying out of it. Since I do not ever participate in online debates of any kind, because it's pointless, I was avoiding the whole scene. They eventually came after me and several others when we inadvertently continued to comment on a different non related thread that they had deemed "a distraction from the real issue." I had no idea their "revolution" had reached that level of fury or that the thread I was participating in was being watched because I wasn't interested in watching a bunch of angry strangers argue past one another.

Anyway, I was summarily informed that failing to participate in the massive pile on bullying they were engaged in made me a racist. When I pointed out that refusing to participate in an online debate in a anonymous forum doesn't mean I'm not advocating for the issue of racism in my real life, and attacking me based on ASSUMPTIONS was hypocritical, I had something like 16 posters I'd never even seen before rush over to inform me how very racist I was for being part of the "deafening silence," oh and "anonymous Internet forums totally are the real life." So obviously I'm lying about advocating elsewhere anyway.