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Dave S.

Colorado, United States

Contributor Level

Total Points

2 Reviews by Dave


I've been on and off AM since 2018. I've got two prior reviews, so this'll be an update, mainly talking about how tenacious you need to be.

I still have a wonderful GF from 2018 and we're closer than ever. She wanted to add partner, starting in Aug of 2018. She got an additional partner in less than a week and he's still in the mix. In May 2021, she added another.

It's tougher for a guy, particularly when you're 73. In my review from last fall, I talked about a woman that I connected with and we had several hotel-dates. We are still friends, but didn't totally connect sexually. We continued to date, but we both continued our searches on AM.

Well, I'd seen an attractive Profile in the middle of March, as I was on an airplane, headed to Alaska. I wrote that I'd contact her when I got back, but didn't follow up again until April 26, well after I got back.

TIMING IS EVERYTHING! I wrote her a carefully crafted directed Message and gave her access to my Private Gallery. She responded with a video of her working (she's in sales). I was genuinely excited to see and hear her and said so immediately. We met for drinks that afternoon and were enjoying each other on a king sized mattress before sundown. We've been regular ever since, with great chemistry in and out of bed.

My point is that persistence, for a man, is an absolute must. Looking for women over 60 narrows the field considerably. I am a good writer and, evidently, good at reading between the lines and saying what's important to my targets. I ALWAYS mention respect, concern for their safety and protection of their existing relationship.

I didn't put in my Profile that I already had a GF, but I addressed it soon after we'd had the first sips of our drinks. My latest GF would actually prefer an exclusive relationship, but she's learning that my other GF is not a threat to her pleasure.

I did drop the GF that I didn't fully connect with. We're still friends and talk every couple of week or so. Funny, connecting, at least for me, has to happen both on a physical and emotional level. The GF that didn't connect physically, is still a friend. I've had a couple where emotional connection seemed unlikely and we didn't make it past drinks.

Hang in there and keep at it.

Ashley Madison
• Updated review

I first reviewed AM in 2018, after meeting my GF that I've been with 2-1/2 years now. We're madly in love, but maintain boundaries around our long-standing marital relationships (almost 30-years for her and over 50-years for me). We both still love our spouses and want to stay with them. We both support each other's marriage and talk about what's going on regularly. We work hard to protect each other and each other's marriage.

She asked me last summer if she could seek a BF #2, to give her the variety she experienced in her early sexual life. (That's quite a titillating story, but not for here). I said, "Yes" and we both went back on AM. In less than two-weeks she hooked up with smart, attractive, professional man that has a wife and a younger GF. He does not have sex with his wife, due to vaginal issues. His GF can seldom meet for family scheduling reasons, so he was looking for an eager woman with flexibility (my GF definitely fits the "eager" part). Anyway, they've been seeing each other for around five-months now and it looks like that's going to fit very well around my relationship with my GF.

This is during COVID-19. There seems to be a serious reduction in the number of women on the site, but there still seems to be around 40-men for each woman. I'm 73 and search for women from 50-years on up, that are attached and live within 40-miles of me AND they've signed on in the last 48-hours. My hope is that they're like-minded, close enough geographically for regular dates and I'm not wasting time with dormant accounts. This morning, that only produced 11-women and the oldest was 60-YO. When I was first on AM, there were two to three times as many women active. I focus on "New" members. Back when I got my GF, I looked almost exclusively at "New" members and I contacted her within 30-minutes of her activating. We had our first lunch date three-days later. Today, there was only one "new" woman and she only want cyber, for now.

This time the pickings are much slimmer, probably due to COVID. Still, I met a nice eager woman, born the same year as me and we've hit it off. We had our first meet and great date about 60-days after I signed on AM. (She had already been talking to others, but I was able to artfully interject myself and percolate to the top of her choices). We were wetting some sheets the next week. We've only met twice, mainly due to COVID issues and her husband's fragile health. We've actually set a target COVID new case level when we'll have our next fun. Hopefully, that'll be later this month.

Anyway, AM still very much has real women. COVID has greatly reduced the numbers, but I think that'll go back up in 2021; however, the men to women ratio will still be that 40-to-1, I'd bet.

You MUST serve up an A-game. DON't start with a $#*! pic. There's plenty of time for that later. You know that you're a contender when she asks for it! DO show a recent full bodied picture. Show yourself in a hobby, if possible. DO NOT lie about your age or weight. You'll never get past the first meet and greet and she'll not overlook it. (I had woman show up 10-years older and 100-lbs heavier. That made me feel horrible, so we communicated in meaningless platitudes until I got away and to my computer and said something like, "We just didn't click.)

Do talk about Trust, Respect, Protection of them and Protection of their existing relationship and Discretion. You have to read between the lines to judge if a woman might prefer you to come on strong, or keep it calm for the first message or two. Try to walk the line between being persistent and not being a stalker. These women are seriously seeking sex partners, BUT many want you to start respectfully, but then they'll love it when you move to graphic sexting, after she's signaled she wants to hear about your game. Be thoughtful and artful. No one size fits all.

It's real, it's real, it's real, but it's not easy. I'm pretty certain about the male/female ratio. My GF got over 100 horny propositions in just two-days. Only one in five or six even bother to look at my Profile. Part of that is due to my age, but part of it is due to that ratio of men to women.

Good luck. Hope you get you some.

Tip for consumers:
Be very careful with private information.

Products used:
Online dating

There are real women here and I found a great one.
• Previous review

I'm a 70-year old married man and spent around three-months on AM. At first I was bombarded by young women from all around the country, running various scams and plots. I just ignored those and focused on searching in my area.

At first, I looked for women 50 and older and actually connected with two that are fifty and seemed genuinely interested in me. One turned out to be about hundred pounds heavier than her Profile shots and a few years older. I spent a coffee on her. Another started showing signs of being a control freak, as we corresponded over about three-weeks, without actually meeting. I got out of that with only an expenditure of time. The AM messaging made it safe and easy for both of us.

I settled into a routine of looking for women 60 and above that had signed up with AM recently. They have a filter for that. I would check in the morning and evening. For security reasons, many real women do NOT show a Profile picture and don't answer questions like "Do you like oral sex". Instead they'll say they're interested in "Whatever Excites Me." My now-girl friend's profile was like that.

I saw my girlfriend within the first hour that she signed onto AM. You have to write a really good introduction to get to first base. I talked about understanding her need to be discreet, but that her limited Profile kept me from evaluating our potential as a match. I asked if she would look at my Profile and let me know. I said that the Profile was as complete and honest as I knew how to make it and that my picture was very recent and accurate.

I talked about how important it was that I respect and protect her privacy and volunteered that we could communicate through AM to get safely started. I talked about it being humbling to go on AM to seek a partner, but that we were both there for similar reasons and I would respect her.

Asking them to look at your Profile is important. Once she responded, I was quick to share my social media profile. I said that it was up to the man to go first, since the woman is more at risk for stalkers and other types of sick perverts. She was quickly sharing equally and we went off AM and used Signal for private, encrypted communications. A couple of months in and several incredible dates and Signal is still our main form of communication.

So, I was on AM for three-months. My girlfriend joined on a Tuesday night, I connected with her that night, ALONG WITH 15 OTHER GUYS. We had a lunch date by that Friday and booked a hotel room for the next Saturday. Our sexual relationship is through the roof good and we're already setting 4-hours sessions going out three-months. We're lucky enough to actually fit a four-day trip together, coming next month.

Are there real women on AM? Hell yes, I connected with three and landed an incredible partner. We're both extremely happy. Do the men greatly outnumber the men? Hell yes. I figure it's around 15 or 20-to-1, so you've really got to be on your game. My girl friend had a couple of other lunch dates and she says that the guys really screwed up by talking about their work and families, etc. Wake up, this is AM and she's already said that she's looking for a sex partner. Talk about how cute or sexy she is and how lucky you feel to meet such an attractive woman. Talk about times that you can get away with her in privacy. Confirm that your situations match. (Both married, etc.) Reaffirm that being discreet is an absolute and that this relationship will be important, but secondary to those already existing. You don't have much time and you WILL NOT get a second shot. Bring your A-game. Spring for a nice place and act like you've been there before.

Remember, she's gone on AM and basically said that she's looking for a sex partner. Most of the women on AM are going to have high sex drives, like us, so don't pussyfoot around like it's a first date with someone that you met at church. Be respectful, courteous, etc., but you're there to decide if you're going to book a hotel room. My girl says that her other suitors screwed this up royally.

Oh, something else about that qualifying date, TOUCH HER. If it's only touching fingers or holding hands a bit, show that you're physically attracted. In my case, someone that I knew from church was at the very next table! We could only touch fingers, but I said that I wished that we could do more. Also, I said that I wanted to walk her to her car and steal a kiss. She says that sealed the deal. A woman wants a man that desires her and can hardly resist her, so you've got to do that.

One last thing. Initially, you'll be bombarded by 20 and 30-somethings with all sorts of come-ons. That's not AM, that's those girls, running their scams. Please ignore them. None of them want to meet a 70-year old man that lives four states away.

Bottom line, there are real women on AM, looking for sex partners. The odds are against men, but if you're patient and persistent, it's realistic to think that you can find a partner.

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