The site allows anyone to write anything about people as long as you do not use their real username in public. You can share it privately within Dm's and spread slanderous unsubstantiated claims to target people without any proof of claims. It's like a highschool "mean girls" club for adults. You aggravate one person in the group and the entire clique rallies around behind them parroting a false narrative until they are shunned and bullied enough

I have been on and off of this site intermittently for the past five years and not once have I ever managed to meet up with anyone as a result. However, I have been lied to, gaslighted, ghosted and stood up. A good number of people on this site wholly operate on hypocrisy and double standards.

The women on this site are rude, entitled, condescending, and disgusting in every sense of the word. Many of their usernames include some variation of "goddess" or "brat" and their profiles openly allude to demands of "worship". You'll love it here if you get off on being emasculated by bloated and delusional tractor sized women who, with their massive batflap arms point you in the direction of their OnlyFans account. Endless 2's that think they're a 10. And the rampant victim mentality on this site has become a malignant cancer that most all turn a blind eye to. All these women are looking for are constant attention and validation. They will bold faced lie to you to get what they want out of you and then ghost you in search of a new victim when the thrill is gone for them.

A fair number of the men on the site are cuckold lapdog simps who have deluded themselves into believing that they actually have a chance with these women. They very much seem to have a zero sum perspective of other men on the site. If any other guy shows even the tiniest inkling or hint of frustration with the women and their sleazy and dodgy ways on this site, the beta simps (in open forum) will pull the DARVO tactics out of their a$$ and do anything and everything to nitpick insignificant details from your post or profile and detract from your overall message when you are getting too close to the truth for their liking. Most of these disingenuous predatory men (some of them old enough to easily be fathers to some of these women they ogle) hide behind a male feminist mask and feign outrage and attack/threaten another guy by twisting and distorting his words and take the viewers reading his smut down a false narrative to paint himself a hero and you a villain. For pointing out their bad behavior they will mislabel you as "desperate" or "deceptive". These "men" love to project their own bad behavior onto you to take the spotlight off themselves. They think it will improve their chances of bedding these young women who couldn't care less about them. I would watch some of these men's profiles days after the fact and for all their misplaced antics all it got them was friend zoned. Pathetic.

This website very much gives off a "hyper-normalisation" vibe. To be accepted by many of these people you have to deny actual reality even as it plays out before your very eyes. They're fully aware that it's fake but to talk about it or point out the proverbial "cracks" in their social capital brings out of them a sort of panic reaction where they will collectively try to shut you down and silence you for fear of you disrupting their own perceived view of the site or chances of obtaining what they think they can get from the women. Pointing out the truth offends them all day. I guess I should stop blaming the clown for being a clown and ask myself why I keep going back to the 'circus'.

Seriously, save your sanity and time and just avoid this trash heap site. You were warned.

This site has always been about naked photos of amateur girls and actual local hookups with real people. THAT part was great.

Plus now they are allowing PROSTITUTION!
That's right, they didn't make a big announcement, but new profiles of girls that are selling themselves have popped up at an amazing rate. No hidding, no whisper whisper. Girls saying point blank that if you want to stick in them, all you need to do is pay.
The website has needed this since they banned Backpage!
Kudos to the website owner, Canadian John Baku!

The negatives: Along with the prostitution, have come a plethora of scammers and sellers.
It used to be that 95% of the female profiles were actual girls actually looking to meet.
Now?
About 80% are selling something sexual. You want it, it's probably available:
Photos, videos, worn socks, wet panties, "special cream", paid webcam services, paid Onlyfans accounts, paid Snapchat premium, paid phone services, paid PERSONAL services (see Prostitution above), other bodily fluids in bottles, paid email services ("give me money and I'll message you"), paid private Instagram, paid Cuckold services ("pay me and I'll bang somebody OTHER than you"), paid Fincuck services ("Pay me. Just shut up and pay me so I can get back to banging somebody OTHER than you.") paid Findom services ("Shut up and pay me, B*tch.").

Additionally, many of the female profiles are just flat-out asking for cash (with management approval). You want to give a total stranger some cash? Half the time the "female" profiles are probably run by some overweight dude in a basement somewhere in Vegas, but if you want to whack your weasel as you give some dude your cash, I guess more power to you. These "girls" will take: Venmo, CashApp, Amazon Wishlist ("buy me things and I might say thank you as I wear it/use it/drive it"), Paypal payments (sexual transactions used to be illegal according to Paypal TOS, guess they're cool with it now-yay!), Western Union, and payments throught the US Mail.

If getting scammed, paying for sex and/or sexual attention is your thing, then this is now the site for you.

Bottom line, used to be great. An actual free website where you could meet an actual girl.
Now? Save yourself the hastle, avoid the website, walk up to the next girl you meet on the street, hand her $20 and ask her to kick you dead square in the nuts.

I stumbled across fetlife and as a 19 year old girl, I'm someone who isn't particularly open about her kinks and fetishes in public or amongst my friends, it seemed like I'd finally found a community I could be open with.

My first attempt at a profile was deleted within a few days by the admins. I later checked my emails to discover a message asking me to send a verification photo of myself with the date/time/username. There was no way I was sending a face photo.

After that I set up a second profile, I included clear body shots of myself holding a piece of scrunched up paper on which I'd written the time and date and my username. I also wrote the same words on parts of my body in lipstick.

Despite clearly writing on my profile that I was interested in talking to people in my local area aged 18-30... I was inundated with messages from mostly much older middleaged men from a variety of different countries. Some messages were rude in tone, others were overly obsequious. Only a couple were worth responding to.

I tried to engage in some public posts, but was promptly shut down by what I can only describe as radical feminist landwhales with I. Q's lower than my age.

I began receiving requests for more photos and videos from people I had never spoken to. I responded to some of these explaining that I was not interested and in response I was met with hostile and disgusting replies (as with a lot of dating sites).

After another week I recieved another email from the fetlife admins asking me to provide a verification photo. I replied to the said admin explaining that I had alreadt provided verification photos on my profile and had he/she looked through my gallery, this would have been clear (I also had a video holding my profile name and the date it was uploaded).

Nevertheless my profile was again deleted and I recieved a very rude message stating that my verification photos were not real. I replied that they clearly were real and sent a subsequent email with a video attached verifying my identity and profile... I received no reply and gave up on fetlife.

If you are a young woman like myself trying to enter the scene, I would strongly advise against fetlife. It's a cesspool of horny middleaged men, obese belligerent women and incompetent admins.

Sincerely

Sarah